Fear

My heart pounds. My breath quickens. The butterflies are doing loopty-loops in my stomach. I feel queasy. My head hurts. It pounds in pain. Okay…It’s time…. all I have to do is get up there and….talk…. sigh…I’ll be okay….no I won’t who am I kidding….there are people….right there….in the seats…..watching me…..

I hate public speaking. It is the worst thing ever in my opinion. I can not talk in front of a bunch of people. I can not sing in front of a bunch of people. Bunch is not necessarily a specific number….It’s more the being the only person front and center. Standing in a group is one thing. Being in front up on a pedestal …nope not interested.

However, I am forcing myself to do this. I can not let my fear win. It is a struggle every time to force myself to put myself in a situation I know I am not comfortable in.

So here I am in front of the class….All I have to do is speak for FIVE minutes… It seems like an eternity… I start….

To sing?

Yes….. I sing.

It is a stupid and silly song I made up.

I look out and there are smiles and quiet giggles.

Okay I can handle this.

When I finish the song I start to speak….Well I am talking about me ….This isn’t too difficult….

I relax.

I end my speech about myself.

See it wasn’t so tough.

Well, until the next time I have to get up in front of everyone…. But every time it gets just a smidge easier…

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