I’m unfit?!

So I hear I’m unfit as a parent. Really. Okay? What does unfit mean? According to my trusty Websters dictionary unfit means ‘not suitable; not qualified; in poor body or mental health.’ All right, there are plenty of unsuitable parents (drug dealers, drug users, and pedophiles come to mind). There is no such thing as a ‘qualified parent’. That’s got to be an oxymoron. I don’t see how poor body health has anything to do with being a parent, plenty of very ill people manage all the time. I can see poor mental health being an issue but then one would have to define ‘poor mental health’ and I’m certainly not qualified for that. Though I believe that if one is mentally not able to care for themselves, they probably aren’t able to care for a child either.
So what makes an unfit parent? I asked a group of parents and the general answer I received was ‘the inability or unwillingness to care for a child’.  I have concerns with the inability aspect of that statement. Because what makes someone in able? If they cannot provide the proper things that the child needs does that make them in able? If you think ‘yes’ well let’s continue. A person is unable to provide clean clothes and food for their child. They ask a family member for help with the feeding of the child and start handwashing the child’s clothes so they have clean clothes. They have trouble keeping up with the clothes and allow some stuff (what they deem not as important) to fall way behind….. Does this make them in able and unfit? If because the parent works 40 hours a week, goes to college, and makes sure the child has food and clean clothes but let’s the house fall behind until vacation times from either work or school… Does that make them in able and unfit?
I will never claim to be the perfect parent and I know at times I need to work to be a better parent, but despite whatever situation I happen to be in, I try to make sure my kids have what they need. If that isn’t enough well I guess they are right and I am an unfit parent but, if that is the case, I will then strive harder to be a better parent.


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